The Best Salsa You'll Ever Eat . . . and Some Mighty Fine Guacamole

This isn't my salsa recipe. I snagged it while I was waitress in college. Believe it or not, the secret is canned, stewed tomatoes, black pepper, and jalapeño juice; and yes, you're going to want a food processor or blender. Sure, you can chop the heck out of those canned tomatoes, but a blender or food processor to purée the tomatoes in their sauce is what really makes this salsa the perfect texture for your chips or to top your Mexican meal.

Yes, it will work with another canned tomato product (not sauce, obviously, but canned whole tomatoes will work) . . . yet it's just not the same. For two to four people noshing on chips and salsa, I use a half can of stewed tomatoes (in Costa Rica look at the Pali or Maxi Pali). You can easily freeze the remainder of the can.

This is purely a to-taste recipe . . . everyone likes their salsa with different amounts of heat. So before I go off on the importance of mis en place, let's talk about, generally, what you'll want and what you're going to do. Let's assume that you're preparing salsa for four. Use half-a-can of stewed tomatoes. What else? I'm glad you asked. The following quantities will satisfy four chip-n-dip hungry eaters (so it's the half-can recipe), and you're going to taste this as you go (which makes it fool-proof); so the quantities below are just suggestions:

• 1/2 Can of stewed tomatoes. Just your ordinary size can. Put the remainder of the can in any freezer-proof container, even a well-sealed ZipLok.
• Canned or jalapeños in a jar, easy to find in Costa Rica, and the juice is the most important part. You may chose to omit all jalapeños, but the juice is essential. You'll want about 1/4 cup if you're using half of the can of stewed tomatoes; so pour-off about a 1/4 cup of the juice into one of your mis en place dishes. As to the jalapeños, see below. Again, you can toss the remainder in the freezer or fridge for later.
• Black pepper (about a tablespoon) . . . start with less and add more if you want/need it.
• Finely chopped onion (any color, chopped as finely as you like -- I like tiny little particles of onion, but you may prefer your salsa more chunky). You'll use a small onion. I can't define small for you. I define small as being about the size of a tangerine. If you're going to make guacamole, too (and why not, indeed?), use a larger onion, obviously.
• Peppers . . . almost any kind: bells, Anaheim, some of those canned/jar jalapeños from which you took your juice, those long red/green peppers that we have in Costa Rica, Hatch chiles . . . heck, you can even use canned peperoncini (which I love). If available, I usually add one or more varieties, including a few of the jalapeños from the can/jar. Now you're going to chop the peppers with your good knife; and how finely you chop 'em depends on how smooth or chunky you want your salsa. I like my salsa smooth, so I chop finely. In any event, aim for about a cup of pepper bits in your salsa. So let's say one cup. Again, if you're making guacamole, too, chop about another half-cup.
• Cilantro. Yeah, I know, lots of folks don't like cilantro. If you're one of those bizarre anti-cilantro folks, leave it out. Otherwise, use a handful (seriously, a handful, squished, of the leafy part). Wash it very well and give it a rough chop. Parsley would work, too, especially flat-leaf parsley.
• A chopped, seeded tomato, if you like 'em. I don't. I get my tomato in this salsa from the can; but if you want a chunkier salsa, by all means toss in a chopped tomato.
• Fresh lime juice (optional) and finely chopped garlic (also optional).
• Salt to taste.

Now we get to my mis en place lecture. This is so much easier if you've already chopped the above ingredients. So indulge me and just do it. Also, if you're planning to make guacamole (below) or if you're planning to prepare anything requiring chopped onions, peppers, tomato, etc., why not chop it now and store it in the fridge until you're ready to cook. See why we mis en place?!

Let's go. Put that can of stewed tomatoes into your blender or food processor and pulse/blend it until it is smooth as soup. Don't wanna see any bits of tomato. Now add about half of your jalapeño juice and about a teaspoon of pepper. Whirl it around again and taste it. Need more flavor? If you've opted for finely chopped garlic, add it now. Then add some salt; and if you think it needs additional flavor/heat, add more jalapeño juice and the rest of that black pepper. Bam! When it has the heat, salt, and pepper of which you approve, you're done. Pour it into a dish and add your chopped onions, chopped peppers, chopped cilantro, and chopped tomato. Again, see why we mis en place? Stir it all together and taste for salt. 

I will say that the fresh cilantro brightens-up this salsa, so I'd never make it without cilantro. Again, if you don't like cilantro and still feels that it needs something to make it brighter, squeeze in some lime juice. Refrigerate at least 30 minutes, taste again, and adjust seasoning. This stuff gets better with time, can easily be prepared a day in advance, and will keep for about four days.

Wanna get tricky? Add some chopped mango, or a few tablespoons of drained canned corn, or chopped pineapple. It's fabulous with pineapple. This basic salsa blends beautifully with fruit. If you're into home-canning, this stuff will keep for six months if properly canned.  

Now let's move on to our guacamole, because you've wisely taken my advice about mis en place and have plenty of chopped onion, tomato, peppers, (maybe some chopped garlic) and cilantro all ready. 

For four people, who will also be noshing on that great salsa, you really only need one avocado. Break open that avocado (there are about a billion demos on the web if you don't know how), Place it in a bowl, smash it with a fork, and add about two tablespoons of chopped onion (my rule is one heaping tablespoon of chopped onion per half of an avocado), about a 1/4 cup of chopped tomato (can you tell I'm not a tomato fan?), a handful of those peppers that you've already chopped, a small handful of chopped cilantro, a teaspoon of salt, a teaspoon of pepper, and the juice of a fresh lime. Smash, smash, smash. Alternatively, you can whip that avocado in your food processor or blender, put the mush into a bowl, and then add your already mis en place'd chunkier ingredients. 

Now how difficult was that?