Strawberry Cream Pie, Tico Style

Strawberry Cream Pie:

You will need:

• A little box of cream (it will probably not be in the refrigerated dairy section but on the boxed juice/milk aisle). One side will say crema de leche and the other side of the box will say dulce leche . . . who knows why.
• Sugar. Just get out your container of sugar because how much depends solely on how sweet you like it.
• A medium tub of quesa crema, which should be cream cheese, but isn't . . . not exactly. This will be in the refrigerated dairy section. There are very small tubs, but you want the one that looks like an ordinary-size tub of sour cream, which is about 220 grams. Many markets offer pineapple flavored quesa crema, and if you want to really trick-out this pie, go for it.
• About a cup of any smashed or cut-up fruit (or a can of fruit, like the pie-filling shown above), Or skip the fruit and use a melted chocolate bar or powdered cocoa (sweetened or unsweetened). You see, here's where you can improvise. Use smashed-up mangoes, bananas, any berry you find, papaya, etc. The important thing here is that your fruit be juice-free. You don't want a cup of fruit swimmin' in juice. So if you're going to buy a can of cherries or fruit cocktail, pour off that juice and save it for your next cocktail. NOTE: I question whether fresh pineapple would work; but I know that the pineapple in the quesa crema isn't a problem. Go figure.
• 12 graham crackers (they'll be marked Fibra y Miel . . . usually made by Pozuelo) or a roll/tube of any cookie (vanilla, chocolate, it matters not). Picture a roll of ChipsAhoy or Ritz crackers -- that type of roll.
• 1/2 stick of very soft butter or margarine.

To make this recipe you must have at least a whisk (preferably a mixer), but otherwise you'll find a wide choice of the ingredients available in the smallest Costa Rica market. So let's talk crust. I made my own pie dough and it wasn't a great success. The dough failure, however, didn't diminish the tasty pie. In hindsight, I'd use a cookie or graham cracker crust, also available at any store in Costa Rica. Let's go:

Get a stick of butter or margarine out of the fridge and let it get soft. Really soft (which for us takes about 10 minutes, max). Find a large ZipLok or a bowl. Place about 12 whole graham crackers (they'll be about 5x3 inches, each) . . . . or the entire "roll" of cookies in your ZipLok or bowl, and smash to bits those cookies/crackers. If you've got a ZipLok,  place it on a towel (or something with a bit of give) and bang the crap out of it with a liquor bottle (or a rolling pin, or a mallet, or a big wooden spoon). When the crackers/cookies are in bits, add the butter and keep banging-away or smashing with a big spoon until this crumbly mixture will hold together in a little clump in your hand . . . and will clearly press into a dish/pan. You can't have too much butter, it will just make the crumbs stickier. You can't have too little butter, it will just cause the crust to be more crumbly. So pour though crumbs into the bottom of any pan that has at least a 1-1/2 inch rim (it need not be a pie pan). You could even use a cookie sheet and make a foil rim/edge. Bam! Your crust is complete.

Now the really easy part. All you're trying to do is create a cream filling that will stand up (and not run over the edge) until you get it into the refrigerator. That's why you need the whisk, or mixer. 

Start with that crema de leche in a bowl, using the entire box, and whip the heck out of it until it clearly resembles whipped cream. If you're using a whisk and not a mixer, you'll get your cardio for the day. Then, spoonful-by-spoonful, add sugar until it tastes as sweet as you want it. Put the bowl of whipped cream into the fridge or freezer. Next, put that queso crema into another bowl and whisk it around until its creamy -- doesn't take long. No, it's not going to whip, so don't expect it to look like whipped cream. Add your sugar, spoonful-by-spoonful, until it tastes as sweet as you want it. Now add your fruit or melted chocolate to the queso crema and add more sugar, if needed. At this point, you can go wild and add a bit ( a spoonful, or so) of vanilla, orange, or almond extract, or a flavored liqueur, or any little liquid flavor you like (maybe a bit of Baileys if you're using chocolate). 

Remember, if you add too much liquid, your pie will become watery . . . tasty, but less creamy. Now add the whipped cream to this bowl, stir/mix well, and toss that yummy, creamy goodness into your crust pan. I topped my pie with the remainder of the can of fruit. Refrigerate for at least an hour. 

Will it slice like pie? Maybe not. Will it still taste fabulous in a bowl. Absolutely. Bam! Cream pie.

NOTE: if you're going with melted chocolate, break-up your chocolate bar into bits. Melt it in the microwave with a teaspoon of any oil (corn oil, coconut oil, any edible oil). Turn on the microwave for absolutely not more than 15 seconds at a time, stirring in between zaps, until your chocolate is liquid. If melting on the stove, you'll still want to use the oil and go on a very, very low heat. You don't want to try to recover a scorched chocolate bar.